A Fireside Magic: the Gathering Tale for Commander Enthusiasts

Some games of Magic: the Gathering are essentially a no-contest. We don't really talk about those - it gives us no pleasure to regale a tale where we crushed our opponent with no resistance, and neither does it make the opponent feel great. We're usually friends with that opponent and don't want to do that to them. But some are down to the wire. Those usually make for the best stories later, and players who lose these games don't usually mind when they are close and could have gone either way

We played a game today in store of Commander Kingdoms that ended up about as close as a game can possibly get. Kingdoms, or Kings, is a rules variant - similar to the card game Bang! - where players have hidden roles and have to attempt to depose or defend a monarch in addition to eliminating each other.

A five-player game, the decks consisted of:

James - playing my Lord Windgrace; a strong ramp/reanimation deck that can draw stupid amounts of cards and loop lands through the graveyard for various effects

Joseph - playing Emmara, Soul of the Accord; a new and untested deck with a lot of untap synergy

Michael - playing Gishath, Sun's Avatar; another very strong ramp deck with some game-ending combos

Jay - playing Temmet, Vizier of Naktamun; a token deck with the potential to go very wide, or very tall, that I built for my son a while ago. Jay has made a few changes, but the premise remains the same

Myself - playing Vial Smasher/Tymna the Weaver; a trigger-burn deck that causes, encourages, and forces players to hurt themselves and each other

Jay took the role of the king; while I knew I was the assassin and had to take him out eventually, he had to be the last one to die, or the victory would go to the bandits! Of course, under the Kingdoms rules, I had no idea who the Bandits were, but one of the three players was the King's Knight, and you can usually count on the Knight's behaviour to give away his role. It's easily confused with the Assassin's Role - all too frequently the Assassin has to help the King out so he doesn't die too early - but there would be no confusion for me in this game!

I'm not going to do a play-by-play, but recap a few important play sequences that determined the outcome of the game

The game started with James initially reluctant to play Windgrace - he's a blue, and especially control player at heart - but the deck draws cards and has board sweepers, so it can take a control role when necessary and shift gears quickly. After picking it up, he was very soon convinced, as the early game saw Windgrace doing what it does best; busting out a stack of lands from the deck, this time via Harrow and Sakura-Tribe Elder.

*HYPNOTOAD SOUNDS***

James soon had The Gitrog Monster, Mina and Denn, Wildborn, and Ramunap Excavator in play, and was drawing three extra cards per turn with an Evolving Wilds. Courser of Kruphix was revealing his draws as it went, and it was all gas, gas, gas. Unfortunately this strong early play attracted the attention of Jay's flock of Entreat the Angels tokens, and while the deck packs a fair defence package against flyers, with black Demons, green reach creatures and the like, James hadn't seen any of them, and an emergency Squall Line left his life total too low - he was soon eliminated as Jay rebuilt his presence, then turned his attention towards me, bringing me down to twenty-six.

Joseph was a little land-light; Emmara had appeared and was holding the ground with a Blackblade Reforged, but we didn't see much action otherwise. Meantime, Michael had played a Ripjaw Raptor, Ranging Raptors and Forerunner of the Empire, so any time one of his Dinos hit the field, he'd draw a card and search up a land. His Commander hit the ground running - and a timely Haze of Pollen from Joseph prevented things from getting too stupid, but suggested his role as the King's protector.

A bit of a pet card, Stuffy Doll is, to me,
what multiplayer Magic: the Gathering is
all about - changing the rules of the   
game to your benefit

My deck struggled to get off the ground, ramping via mana rocks into virtually nothing. An early Tynma the Weaver and Queen Marchesa were soon outclassed on the field or ran into token blockers after drawing only a few cards; Tynma's only weapon was my own copy of Blackblade Reforged (providing no evasion) and Vial Smasher is a liability in Kingdoms; she tends to randomly hit the wrong players. I took a risk not long after the untimely passing of James and Lord Windgrace, and played one of my pet cards, Stuffy Doll, naming Jay - the King - suggesting that I may, in fact, be one of the bandits.

Stuffy Doll stayed on the board for the rest of the game

Michael, noting the presence of Stuffy Doll, accelerated his gameplay; Runic Armasaur allowed him to draw cards whenever I tapped the doll to deal damage to itself, and another Gishath attack let a small stack of Dinosaurs hit the field, clearing it of other creatures and pinging Stuffy Doll - and Jay - via Forerunner triggers, and the ramp and draw triggers ended up giving him enough resources to bring Zacama, Primal Calamity into play during his next turn and go to town, including the destruction of most of Jay's board state, and Joseph's along with it.

I bring out a Sunforger via Godo, Bandit Warlord since I've seen no removal spells all game, claw back some life (to forty!) and draw a few cards by attacking the land (and now permanent) light Joseph with my equipped Tynma the Weaver over the next couple of turns. This, unfortunately, confirms my role as the Assassin when I decline to deal lethal Commander damage to the King. Michael - who is very quick to pick up on cues like this - points his Zacama toward my Sunforger once he untaps, setting off a cascade of effects as I respond by searching up Utter End to exile it, and he responds by destroying everything else I control - aside from the indestructible Stuffy Doll.

Jay plays Mycosynth Lattice, "accidentally" reveals that he has Nevinyrral's Disk in hand - thankfully, I had topdecked a Bedevil last turn - and makes a copy of Stuffy Doll via Clever Impersonator. His doll names Michael. This winds up being very important shortly.

As usual, however, Michael ignores this kind of semi-political gesture, and swings his Commander at Jay. After blocks are declared - Stuffy Doll and a couple of tokens are thrown under the bus - he plays Boros Charm (double strike mode!) and flashes in Dictate of the Twin Gods for a quadruple damage Commander kill. Obviously I can't allow this kind of thing to happen - my Assassin's contract is quite clear in that I must strike the finishing blow or I don't get paid, and we can't have that - so the Bedevil has to be pointed at Gishath, rather than the Lattice in response to the Disk trigger. Fortunately, the Disk hasn't hit the field yet.

I'd rather not control
my own agent, thanks

When it comes around to my turn, I topdeck like a freaking champion and play Voidstone Gargoyle naming Nevinyrral's Disk - we can't have that kind of nonsense happening at this point of the game. It's a pretty hateful-looking card, but I make a point of never naming a Commander with it, and most of the people I regularly play with know it as a combo breaker rather than a piece of oppression - it's certainly serving that role here! I play Xantcha, Sleeper Agent, which goes to Joseph - he looks like he could use a 5/5 to swing with, right? Jay and Michael rebuild their board state a little, while Joseph appears to have finally come across some lands - he now has five (!) in play. Michael's Dictate is still in play from his earlier kill attempt, so it's time for me to make a strong, but risky play; when Jay plays White Sun's Zenith with X=13, I respond with Parallectric Feedback, burning him for thirty and sending him to three. Mike doesn't have lethal on Jay this turn, however, thanks to that large horde of cat blockers that he paid very dearly for.

Now things get dirty; I play Gisela, Blade of Goldnight and pass the turn.

It turns out that Joseph really could use that 5/5 to swing with; he equips his Blackblade Reforged to Xantcha and swings "ten" damage at Jay - which is quadrupled to forty - and when it hits the Stuffy Doll naming Michael, it gets quadrupled to a hundred and sixty. Mike has enchantment removal for his own Dictate, but it's no use - the damage is only reduced to forty, which is still lethal. Mike joins James, and I'm pretty sure at this point the bandits are out of the game. On my turn, Gisela whacks Joseph, and he's finished off by a couple of Xantcha activations, sending the sleeper agent back to my side of the field.

Sh*t.

Now it's maths time for Jay; he calculates and doesn't have enough mana to kill me via Xantcha triggers, so instead uses it to play Hour of Reckoning, destroying everything on my side of the board. Except, of course, the still-indestructible Stuffy Doll. He then plays Marshal's Anthem, returning Linvala, the Preserver to play. He gains five life, sending him to eight, and all his creatures are boosted by one. It's now combat time, and heading my way are, um, thirteen 3/3 cat tokens and a 4/4 golem? Stuffy jumps in front of the golem, popping Jay upside the head for four and sending him to that same amount, and I take thirty-nine points of damage, going to a single life. My hand at at this point consists solely of an Arid Mesa that I won't be able to activate, but Jay can't get that final point of damage in this turn.

In Jay's end step, Stuffy Doll pings itself, sending him to three.

We go to my turn. I draw...come on topdeck of dreams...and it's

Not pictured: the actual mountain I drew

But it's not the end of the game yet; while it looks like I have nothing, there are two assets remaining. One is my so-far unplayed commander Vial Smasher the Fierce; now freed from the constraints of multiplayer Magic, she's free to pick my single opponent at "random" for the target of damage, so I cast her. The second is a copy of Throne of the High City, which I played much earlier in the game. I crack it to become the Monarch so I can draw a card at the end of turn, hoping it's an instant with converted mana cost three or greater.

It's this card:

My disappointment from the previous turn changes immediately to joy as I realise that the Vial Smasher trigger will kill Jay in his upkeep when I cast this. He'll be dead before I can lose the three life when the spell resolves.

Does it get any closer than this?

If you've had a close call in a game of Magic, and it's closer than this one was, I'd love to hear about it!